The main causes of unforgiveness in marriage! (4)

The main causes of unforgiveness in marriage! (4)


Unappreciated sacrifice: A partner denies himself the most basic neccesities of life in order to maximise satisfaction of his absent partner only for his partner
to come and sweep all past efforts under the carpet,professing less responsible men to be better than her husband just because they did not deprive
themselves of anything for the consideration of their spouse´s comfort. It could be so heart-breaking. Such a man may most likely find it difficult to ever sacrifice for such a woman again,since such heroic acts,from experience could only earn him resentment in the past.
I know a man who has been living in Europe. He worked day and night and despite all apportioned himself little or no comfort in Europe,prefering instead,to send virtually all he earned to his wife and child in Africa,leaving nothing behind for himself.After successfully arranging the citizenship of the European country he decided that things would be easier if he brought his family. He did and never had rest since then. His wife came,he fixed up her paper issues and the woman started all sorts of querries. First,she started by admiring other men´s cars which would have cost her husband next to nothing of his income,had he wanted to be selfish. The man tried to correct her but she would not listen. Next,she started fighting over money and and and... Even in the world,it is often said that one good turn deserves another or better still,once bitten,twice shy. Please,brethren,for those of you who have the tendency of behaving like the woman in the case above,try to always remind yourself that there is God. It could be helpful to you at such points of misjudgements. Also try to avoid corrupt friends and family members who are mostly the motivators towards these kinds of misbehaviour. Always remember that only he who appreciates a little would get much from God (Matthew 25:23). If a situation like that is not properly resolved,it could lead to unforgiveness.
Punishing your spouse for an ex´s wrong-doing: People are the products of all the relationships they have passed through. It could breed grudges if you have a good partner who is convinced that you are not letting him enjoy his marriage because of grudges from other relationships that are borne out of your recklessness rather than any fault of his. There have been a couple of situations in which some partners (in this case,more of women) carry over the grudges against their ex-lovers into their marriages and most times,unknowingly start imagining that thier partners are their ex-lovers and most often start exhibiting the grievances against their ex-lovers´ maltreatments against them in the past. In some cases,they start to avenge themselves against a husband who has done nothing wrong,except that he is unussually nice. Such maltreatment could make the man,if he realizes the reason for lack of peace in his house,to start to harbour grudges and unforgiveness. If you are in this kind of situation in your marriage,there is need for you to seek deliverance from the powers that are continually focussing your attention on the deeds of an ex-lover,even though you are already married. If you don´t,it may ruin your marriage before you know it. And it is noteworthy to know that most,if not all ex-lovers would not need you back,except as a hidden sex toy.
Even if you are in any of these situations and it seems like there would never be a solution,things can be rectified. For with God,nothing is impossible. Only confess and repent from your sins and resist the devil and he would flee from you (James 4:7). Click to read Unforgiveness in a marriage - Symptoms and solutions!


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By: Emmanuel and Blessing Agbo.